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“You have people who are livid that you can be confused or hurt by how a person chooses to grieve. Psychiatrists from the San Diego Widowhood Project studied surveys from widows and widowers.They found that 25 months after the spouse’s death, 61 percent of men were either remarried or involved in a new romance, compared to only 19 percent of women.

It’s like they go out there and say, ‘Oh, you’re pretty. ’ They end up getting into relationships they aren’t ready for.” Lara met Dave online through a networking site.

Women who are swimming in a massive gray area with very few resources to guide them.

Women immersed in a world of grief that is not their own. “It’s so conflicting, it makes my head spin,” says Rachel, a 42-year-old professional who has been dating a widower for three years.

“As much as it can hurt me, being allowed to participate in the grieving process to an extent by facilitating these opportunities allows me to not be ignored,” she says.

“Otherwise, when grieving happens, I don’t exist.” Lara shares her thoughts and frustrations in an online support group for women like her—the wives and girlfriends of widowers, or WOWs and GOWs as they call themselves.

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He was 26 when his first wife took her own life while she was seven months pregnant.

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